Musings…
Someone once said, back in the early ’90′s, that the advent of email would make brilliant writers out of all of us. They opined that the fine art of the English language, almost lost to convenience, would find its renaissance in the world of internet communication.
The bastard was wrong, horribly wrong.
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Now that I’m approaching 40, I’m more tolerant but also more cranky. No, that’s not a dichotomy.
I think in our youth we find intolerance with those whose views of the world differ from our own (gay/straight, conservative/liberal, chunky/creamy).
As young people, we seek identity, so we group our world into comfortable little clusters of “us” and “them”. As we get older, though, I think we grow comfortable with differences in opinion and motive, but less so in someone’s words and action. Now, it’s “think what you want, but damn it, do what you say you will do.”
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Pick up the damn phone and say hello. Stop text messaging already! You look staggeringly silly pouring your soul out to 12 buttons on a phone made impossibly small by technology. What an evil, cruelly impersonal way to communicate - with license-plate style acronyms. Text messaging has reduced us to a binary contact point somewhere far away.
And since when did it become more convenient to click through each button’s choices to spell out “Hello” instead of just SAYING, “Hello?”
However, in the spirit of the time in which we live, I offer an acronym of my own: PUTFP! You figure it out.
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Capital letters = SHOUTING.
So if I say, “Hmmmm,” is it the same as saying, “HMMMM”? Can you shout a “Hmmmm”? And if you can shout “Hmmmm”, what would it sound like?
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If a tree falls in the forest, and it falls on a Sierra Club member, would I smile secretly? Probably.
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On that note, Al Gore is the personification of the word, “hypocrite”.
And you all know I’m right.
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If the IRS can locate a tax evader in the rugged mountains of Alaska, and the ICE can find an illegal alien working part-time in a restaurant kitchen in rural Iowa, where the HELL is Osama Bin Laden?
